Season to be jolly or ...

The year-end is known to be a time for parties and gatherings. However, this may not be the same for everyone. There are people out there in the community who may find themselves left out or who may not be comfortable with all the hustle and bustle. Some of us maybe party animals but not everyone is. So it didn't come as a surprise whens someone says to me: It's rather lonely you know during this time of the year. People are gathered at parties and etc but I'm not that type so I stay away.

I remember a colleague who was a bachelor and since passed on. He looked forward to coming to work because he said at least there would be people around him. When at home, he would be faced with the boredom of the four walls and his landlord. The sad thing was that he would turn to alcohol to be his companion and in the proverbial way "drown his sorrows". But for someone who is  a teetotaler what is the option? Today there is the Internet and world wide web... but going into chat rooms can be as bad as hitting the bottle. We know of many scams and pornography and etc where the unwary visitors get into greater depression in the aftermath of a session.

Loneliness is a state of the mind, so say the expert. You can talk yourself into a state of depression or you can get out of it, snap yourself into a different mode - a happy high note and move forward. I am incline to take this route and get myself out there with the maddening crowd; get to know people, start a network, join an interest group and before you know it you will find yourself into circulation.

If you wallow in self-pity; believe in the doomsday and keep to yourself then there is little that even the medical psychologist can do. I would say go wear some bright colours, pick up the phone, make a call to a friend for dinner, tea at Starbucks or even breakfast at McDonald's or supper at Marriott Hotel. Yes, you may get a nay answer today but there's always tomorrow and another day. Yes, you may not have many friends but you need a point where you can start off. It need not cost you an arm or a leg unless you choose to flount your wealth and you'll attract the wrong sort of friends.

We all live in a world where people will move on, some even to another world when they are older. So we have to accept that if we don't build up the network of friends or interact with other fellow humans, then we will have to accept that we will have to live a hermit's life.

A Year of Hits, Misses

As I write this post, I could see the dark clouds blanketing the sky and the swooshing of water on the road as the vehicle drive on the rainfall. Eleven months have passed and there's just another page on the calender before the year draws to a finish. Things haven't changed much since the same time last year. My office is just as it was though more files are fighting for a space on my table. But don't get me wrong... it doesn't translate to more business. In fact with  Europe now in double dip recession and the US struggling like a swimmer caught by ripping current off Australia's Bondi Beach.

Reflecting on the past months, I would say I learnt more about the meaning of friendship. I learnt that there are so-called friends who can change their sincerity like the way chameleon changes their colours. Beyond  the rhetoric and handshakes, there's a somewhat eerie emptiness. Fortunately there was no serious harm to anyone but indeed I am amused at the antics played out over the years. They reminded me also of another person I met, who would be all hyped up with high-five and all the Mona Lisa smiles, to hide a distorted picture of selfishness and self-centredness. I guess this is mankind and it happens everywhere. Another encounter was a personality that would stop at nothing to get a grasp at power... though I have no intention in competing for even a ounce of it given that I would rather focus on my own business. The lack of sincerity befuddles me as I watch the player unfold all the tapestry to grab the attention of the grand audience.

My thought turned to the lyrics of The Seekers song I'll Never Find  Another You.. and I thought of my pets who have gone to their resting place. With me still is my faithful and only pet Richie who is also growing older in years. But his respect for mankind never change. He's as obedient as he was 12 years ago. Not a day would pass where he'll not be there to welcome me as I get into the covered driveway. No wonder it is said: a dog is a man's best friend.

And talking about friends, true friends, yes soon it will be Christmas and a select group of friends will gather for food and merry-making. It's not that we need a special occasion to gather but we'll do it anyway. Tonight another group of friends would be gathering for dinner - a special group - as they're my classmates from the 60s. How we have grown and yet we never forget to relive those good old school-go days, laugh at one another when we talked about the silly things we do, and reminisce on the minor incidents which today become magnified as milestones in our days at school.